Comes in Many Forms . . .
Abuse touches all walks of life, from children to the elderly. Survivors of abuse often find themselves dealing with serious psychological (and sometimes physical) consequences from their experience: low self-esteem, difficulty forming and keeping intimate relationships, sexual issues, anger issues, depression, anxiety, trust issues, post traumatic stress, difficulties with sleep, difficulties with weight, to name a few.
Abuse can take on many different forms, including physical, sexual, emotional, verbal, and neglect. It can occur in many different environments, from the home (incest, domestic violence, rape) to institutions and the workplace (bullying of kids, elder abuse, sexual harassent) and even religious or community settings (hate crimes).
If you have been a victim of abuse, you are not alone. We can help sort through the complicated feelings and reactions that stem from abuse. Together, let’s rebuild your trust – trust in yourself, trust in others, and trust in the world.
can Lead to . . .
An addiction can make no sense at all logically. A person can lose their job, spouse, friends, family, health, or home due to an addiction. Addictions often provide brief momentary pleasure but at a great cost to the user. Without treatment or engaging in recovery activities, addictions will progress and sometimes lead to disability or premature death.
Addiction takes on MANY FORMS…
An addiction can take many forms, and manifest itself in different ways. Substances such as alcohol, tobacco, heroin cross the blood-brain barrier of a person’s brain, creating both a physical and psychological dependence on the substance. However, anything that a person becomes psychologically dependent on, despite negative consequences, can be considered an addiction: such as gambling, food, sex, internet, or pornography.
Struggling with Addition? There is HELP!
If you are struggling with an addiction, there is help. Through professional treatment we can help you manage a harmful addiction and control the desire. With therapy, you can start to leave your craving behind and replace it with a healthy positive desire and renewed sense of purpose.
Don’t Let it Control YOU . . .
Don’t let ANGER Control YOU. Anger isn’t always easy to cope with. Repression, explosions, and chronic resentment are all examples of poorly handled anger. When anger isn’t handled well, the damage it does to our selves and our loved ones can be both visible and invisible. Let it out in a healthy way and then let it go. Don’t let your anger control you. If any of these 10 styles of dealing with anger sound familiar, it may be time to seek help:
1. Anger Avoidance: Fear of your own anger or anger in others causes you to lack assertiveness and to be walked on by others.
2. Sneaky Anger: Instead of openly expressing anger to others, you patronize (saying you’ll do something, but never intending to do it). This makes it difficult for you to know your own wants and needs.
3. Paranoid Anger: You believe people are out to get you or what you have. You view others as angry instead of acknowledging your own rage. This causes insecurity and mistrust.
4. Sudden Anger: Your sudden, explosive release of anger gives you a sense of relief afterwards. But, you can lose control and say and do things that you regret (and are possibly violent).
5. Shame-Based Anger: When someone ignores you or says something negative you see it as proof that the other person dislikes you as much as you dislike yourself. You lash out at the other person and fell worse about yourself.
6. Deliberate Anger: Your goal is to get what you want by threatening or overpowering others (bullying). This often backfires back on you.
7. Addictive Anger: You feel powerful when you explode. You pick fights to gain that intensity and emotional excitement.
8. Habitual Anger: You look for the worst in everything and get angry over little things. Life is predictable, safe and stable – even if it is unhappy.
9. Moral Anger: You feel justified in your anger when others have broken a rule or been bad. You need to punish or scold that person. There is no middle ground in your way of viewing the world (black ad white thinking), you attack problems or differences or opinion instead of compromising or empathizing.
10. Hate: Hate is anger that never gets resolved. You can’t forgive or move on. You think about ways of punishing the other person and sometimes act on those ideas. You become bitter and frustrated.
Worry can be a normal, appropriate response to some life situations. But, what if you worry too much? When your level of stress or anxiety interferes with work, school, relationships, or causes you to be unable to lead a normal life, you probably have an anxiety disorder.
Anxiety disorders can manifest differently in different people. Some of us have panic or anxiety attacks (Panic Disorder), other people struggle with specific situations or fears (phobias), and a separate group of people may even have continual thoughts or behaviors they can’t stop (Obsessesive-compulsive Disorder), to name a few. Symptoms of anxiety can appear emotionally, possibly as feelings of panic, restlessness or irritability, or even physically, sometimes as heart palpitations, sore muscles, and difficulty sleeping. Whether you live in a constant state of tension or struggle with a specific phobia, we can help you overcome your anxiety and enjoy a calmer, more normal life.
We will help you:
- Eliminate excessive worry about both the big and small stuff in life
- Enjoy relationships without fear
- Have self-confidence
- Get rid of obsessive thoughts and rituals
- Relax and feel calmer
- Let go of perfectionism
- Enjoy the joyful things in life!
Child and Play Therapy
Being a child isn’t always as easy as it seems . . .
It is normal for kids to have short-lived emotional reactions to conflicts and difficulties at home, at school, and in social situations. But what happens if your child’s sadness, anger, or fear does not disappear? As a parent, you know your child best. Even if there is no clear cause for their changed behavior, if your child seems moody, sad, withdrawn, or fearful, he/she is telling you they are dealing with something they can’t handle alone. Let us help your child find their smile again.
- Insomnia or increased sleep
- Sudden changes in appetite (especially in adolescents)
- Mood swings
- Periods of sadness, tearfulness, or depression (including remarks about suicide)
- Severe anxiety when the parent leaves
- Refusal to go to school
- Isolation or social withdrawal
- Overly aggressive behavior (biting, kicking, hitting)
- Learning or attention problems (ADHD or similar)
- Behavioral problems (acting out, bedwtting, eating disorders, etc.)
- An incrtease in complaints about feeling sick or unwell
- Drop in grades or disruptive behaviors at school
- Fear of sleeping alone
- Signs of alcohol or substance abuse
- Suffering from a serious or life threatening illness
- Known abuse (sexual, physical, emotional)
Don’t wait until your relationship is in crisis to get help!
Statistics show that most semi-committed relationships never make it to the next level. As your “relationship coach,” we will help you and your partner see past the hurt or disconnect to reach more satisfaction, connection and security in your relationship. With our help, you can move beyond the pain to release emotional blocks and develop healthier communication and negotiation skills. We are passionate about helping couples at any stage of their relationship. Whether you are just starting out, fully committed, or even looking for a compassionate way to move on from one another, there’s never been a better time to seek guidance and clarity.
We can help you and your partner to:
- Explore how childhood issues and beliefs influence present behaviors and perceptions of one another
- Learn how to communicate more effectively
- Learn how to be a better listener
- Interrupt hurtful and unproductive patterns
- Stop engaging in power struggles
- Negotiate win-win relationship solutions
- Deepen intimacy, connection and trust
- Work through built up anger and past disappointments
- Heal from an affair or infidelity
- Resolve issues between you, including financial and sexual issues
- Improved sexual satisfaction
Children and relationship problems
Where did your patterns come from? Your relationship is often a model for your children and can profoundly influence how they behave in their own future relationships. To teach children how to have healthy boundaries and attachments in a close relationship, you must first learn and practice these skills yourself.
Ending the relationship
Ending a relationship can be a difficult and painful process. If you have decided to end your relationship, we can provide structured support for a compassionate and appropriate closure. Without learning the skills it takes to end a relationship appropriately, many people end up entering similarly unsatisfying and conflict-ridden relationships in the future. We want to help you break that pattern for good.
Our therapeutic work is influenced by the work of Harville Hendrix , Ph.D. and IMAGO (author of Getting the Love You Want and Giving the Love that Heals), John Gottman, Ph.D. (author of Why Marriages Succeed or Fail and Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work), in addition to our own extensive experience working with couples.
Death (Grief & Loss)
Loss is a fact of life . . .
Every person will experience a significant loss at some point in their lives. The death of someone they love, the loss of a limb or body function, or even an intense disappointment can cause grief. Grief is the emotional distress we experience after a loss. This emotional distress is the conflicting feelings of sorrow, anger, loneliness, sadness, anxiety or fear, shame and/or guilt. Hiding or denying these emotions will cause you to remain “stuck” in them longer and prevent healing. You don’t need to try and navigate your way through the pain alone. We can help you to go through the grieving process faster and easier.
The stages of grief everyone goes through are:
• DENIAL & ISOLATION – Denying the loss has occurred and withdrawing from usual social interactions. This can last moments, months or longer.
• ANGER – Feeling angry at the person who inflicted the pain, the world or God for allowing this to happen, or ourselves for not stopping it from happening (even if we were powerless to change things).
• BARGAINING – The belief that we can change things through bargaining. “If I do _____, then I wont hurt so much.”
• Depression – There is numbness now (even as anger and sadness remain underneath). The person may withdraw from others, have trouble sleeping or sleep too much, eat too little or too much, or no longer find enjoyment in things that he/she used to enjoy.
We will help you to:
• Experience, express, and adjust to painful changes
• Find effective ways to cope with these changes
• Understand that you can still honor the relationship, while moving on with your life
• Decrease the chances of slipping into a major depression
• Express things that your scared are “wrong” to say or feel
Depression and the Affects
1 out of EVERY 6 Adults . . .
If you are one of the 1 out of every 6 adults affected by depression, you know only too well how difficult depression is to live with.
Depressed people lose interest in the things they usually like to do and often feel sluggish, irritable, or fatigued. Waves of sadness and feelings of worthlessness or excessive guilt for no particular reason are commonplace.
Women & Men are Affected Differently . . .
Women and men are affected differently – because many men believe that expressing emotions is a feminine trait, they often do not seek clinical help for depression; this may be one of the reasons why CDC findings show that men are about four times more likely than women to commit suicide.
Depression in Children . . .
Depression in children may look different than it does in adults. If you are afraid your child is depressed look for changes in school performance, behaviors, and sleep patterns.
Depression is NOT a Personal Weakness!
Remember, depression is NOT a personal weakness, nor is it something that can just be “willed away,” no matter how hard you try. Through therapy we can ease the pain and help give you a more positive outlook on life. Together, we can teach you how to learn from your depression without being lost in it.
With our help, you will:
• Identify distored or negative thought patterns that contribute to feelings of hopelessness
• Improve your self-esteem
• Reduce self-defeating behaviors
• Develop a sense of trust in your abilities
• Gain a greater sense of fulfillment in your life
• Restore or increase connection and intimacy in relationships
Become a part of life again!
Divorce or Separation
Divorce is a serious problem in the United States, where about half of all marriages end in divorce.
Divorce Occurs when . . .
Usually divorce occurs when couples feel they can no longer live with one another because of fighting or anger, or because they no longer experience the love they felt when they first married.
Divorcees Initially Believe . . .
Divorcees initially believe that their divorce will result in greater individual happiness, however, divorcees typically trade one set of problems for another.
National Center for Health Stats . . .
The National Center for Health Statistics finds that married women suffer half the injuries that divorced women do, and research conducted by the Centers for Disease Control found that divorced individuals are three times more likely to commit suicide than their married counterparts.
From a Doctor . . .
Dr. Walter Grove, from Vanderbilt University, found that divorced men are over nine times more likely to die of tuberculosis and over four times more likely to die from diabetes than their married counterparts. Meanwhile, he found that a divorced male is 3.4 times more likely to die from any cause than a married male and a divorced female is twice as likely to die from any cause then her married counterpart.
Divorce’s negative effects on children
The wealth of information on how divorce negatively impacts children is vast. Divorce diminishes every area of a child’s life and the effects of divorce follow the child well into adulthood. If you’re going through a divorce, don’t wait to consider therapy! We can help both you and your children navigate the difficult problems associated with divorce so that you can once gain go on to live full, happy lives.
First, it should be noted that an eating disorder is not a diet . . .
Can rob you of basic nutrients that your body needs to function properly, and can cause considerable damage to your body. While following a consistent diet can be healthy, an eating disorder is considered an illness that permeates every aspect of the sufferer’s life – physically, mentally, and emotionally.
Typically stem from deep-seated psychological issues. When a person’s entire feeling of self-worth and self-esteem hinges on what they weigh or how they look, then eating disorders can occur. Therein lies an important distinction: eating disorders stem from a psychological issue related to low self-esteem. There is no way to treat the symptoms without effectively treating the source of the eating disorder.
Anorexia, Bulimia, Compulsive Eating, Binge Eating . . .
If you are currently dealing with eating issues such as anorexia, bulimia, compulsive eating, binge eating, or something else, Sage Therapy Center can help. We will help you identify and nullify the negative patterns which arise and keep you locked into the disorder. Together, we can replace them with healthier dieting and lifestyle habits.
Expressive Art Therapy
Through Art . . . we can Nurture Healing, Growth, Clarity, and Vision Within
Expressive arts therapy is the practice of using imagery, storytelling, dance, music, drama, poetry, movement, dreamwork, and visual arts together, in an integrated way, to foster human growth, development, and healing. It is about reclaiming our innate capacity as human beings for creative expression of our individual and collective human experience in artistic form.
Expressive Therapy can Soothe . . .
Expressive therapy can soothe one’s soul and help you manage stress. If you have a lot of things on your plate, you can manage them much easier through the use of art therapy. Contrary to traditional art expression, the process of creation is emphasized rather than the final product. By tapping into one’s natural capacity for creative expression and creative community, we can nurture healing, growth, clarity, and vision within.
Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual Issues
I am Who I am . . . Living in a World of Constant Judgement . . .
It can be difficult to be gay in this straight world. Statistics show that the rate of depression is much higher among the homosexual population than the heterosexual population.
You are Important!
We offer gay-affirmative individual and couples therapy. What this means is that we don’t view homosexuality, bisexuality, and other variations in sexual orientation as problems, but instead support your sexual identity. Your sexuality is important, but it is neither focused on, nor ignored.
Stages of Acceptance . . .
Most people go through 6 stages as they progress toward sexual acceptance. When working with people where sexuality is an issue we know that it is important to understand what stage or stages your in currently. The stages of homosexual identity formation are as follows:
• Identity Awareness – The point when the child or adolescent begins to realize that he/she has feelings that are different from other people and from what they are being taught.
• Identity Pride – Anger toward society, parents, friends, religion or others who refuse to accept their sexuality
• Identity Synthesis – when homosexuality becomes a part of who you are, not the defining factor for your life.
• Identity Comparison – The person doesn’t understand why his/her feelings are different from their peers, parents, siblings, and society.
• Identity Tolerance – The person rebels against his/her feelings and attempts to deny them.
• Identity Acceptance – The person begins to embrace his/her sexuality and all the positives and difficulties that go with it.
Aside from issues arising from the first 5 stages defined above, treatment for homosexual clients who are experiencing depression, anxiety, stress, and relationship problems isn’t any different from heterosexual clients.
We can help with:
• Men who have difficulty forming or sustaining intimate relationships
• Lesbian, male couples who are going through a difficult time in the relationship
• People living with HIV/AIDS, or other life threatening illnesses
• People whose partners have HIV/AIDS, or other life threatening illnesses
• Gay widowers who are dealing with the death of their partner
Healing One’s ENTIRE SELF . . .
Holistic healing is the consideration taken towards healing one’s entire self: mind, body, and soul. Holistic practitioners believe that physical illnesses are symptoms of a greater imbalance that may not stem from the physical, but rather the spiritual self, and that due consideration must be undertaken to heal all aspects.
Holistic – a Lifestyle Approach
That’s exactly what we try to achieve through holistic healing – a lifestyle approach that addresses all parts of the individual– physical health, mental wellness, emotional well-being, and spiritual values are all taken into consideration. Holistic healing is an ongoing journey towards wholeness: living better, being healthier, and experiencing deeper levels of compassion. Through holistic healing we understand the need to tend to relationships, appreciate the earth and our environments, and foster a deeper level of understanding towards humankind in general.
Personal Success – Your Journey . . .
Personal success can vary widely depending on the individual. Some of us were meant to artists, others teachers, and still others to pursue mathematics and science. Some artists work better with a blank canvas, others within a template. Some people like to organize a to-do list and others cringe at the thought.
Your Journey to Self-Discovery
The bottom line: everyone has different strengths and weaknesses. The first step in your journey of personal growth and discovery begins with self-awareness. Everyone has a different personality type, different experiences, and different objectives. Does your idea of success stem from your own beliefs or from a major influencer in your life?
Building the Foundation of Self-Awareness and Self-Knowledge
If you travel through a forest you can’t see the entire forest as a whole. Only through identification can you zoom out and view the entire forest. Therefore, personal development begins by building a foundation of self-awareness and self-knowledge, from which one can create an identity and fulfill one’s aspirations. If one only looks at the surface of the ocean, one can never know it’s depths.
We will help you develop yourself to your full potential so that you may share your unique gifts with the world.
Sexual problems are an issue that many people are hesitant to discuss – but research shows that sexual dysfunction is a common occurrence: 43% of women and 31% of men report some degree of difficulty. Fortunately, most sexual problems are treatable, and sex therapy and counseling can help.
Psychological factors like stress, worry, anxiety, feelings of guilt, past sexual trauma, and depression are common culprits of sexual dysfunction. When a sexual problem is mismanaged or only partially treated, it is sometimes common that the condition will subside temporarily but resurface again. If the cycle continues, it reinforces failure and can eventually cause people not to access any help and suffer the problem their entire lives. So, it is important to get a thorough assessment from professionals and therapists who are qualified to manage sexual problems.
Physical factors such as heart disease, neurological issues, diabetes, hormonal imbalance, chronic diseases such as kidney and liver failure, or drug or alcohol use, can contribute to sexual problems as well. Sexual dysfunction is a difficult problem to face – but talking to a therapist can help. At Sage Therapy, we understand your need to be discreet while we help you overcome the sexual problem that you may be dealing with.
Stress – Anxiety – NO CONTROL
Despite whatever issue you may be facing that causes you to feel stress, worry, or just feeling bad in general, discussing it in confidence with an understanding counselor can make a profound difference in how you are able to manage and cope with the situation. Regardless of whether the source of stress stems from a factor within or outside your control, our therapists will listen and help you manage the anxiety that you may be feeling.
Leave the Stress and Worry Behind you . . .
We know from experience that worrying doesn’t solve any problems and it can’t fix things that are outside of one’s control. If there are things in your life that you have no control over, then it makes sense to stop wasting energy worrying over them. While this is obvious in theory, it can be very difficult in practice – and the best solution is to seek out an understanding and caring therapist who’s also an ‘outsider’ to the situation. By sharing with a counselor, you can be put your problem into perspective and leave the stress or worry that you once faced behind!